


All I needed to say

by Jinbeizaki



Series: GalliRei Week [5]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-22
Updated: 2021-02-22
Packaged: 2021-03-12 08:40:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,576
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29631984
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jinbeizaki/pseuds/Jinbeizaki
Summary: Those words they kept thinking about had to be said aloudthatnight, if not when would they have another opportunity?Was there even going to be another chance to tell those words?
Relationships: Reiner Braun/Porco Galliard
Series: GalliRei Week [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2156304
Comments: 6
Kudos: 27





	All I needed to say

**Author's Note:**

> **GalliRei Week** Day 6: GalliRei watching stars / Free prompt
> 
> This chapter is more of a free prompt while the next one is more about watching stars. Sorry for being late despite it being the first prompt I worked on. 
> 
> This happens the night before Porco goes to Paradis along with Pieck.

“Come in,” Reiner said loud enough to be heard, his eyes not leaving the papers on the desk nonetheless. The person who had knocked on his door would tell him what they wanted, no need to lose even a second by glancing away.

Barely paying heed, the door opened and closed itself without a word from the person now in the same room as him, no salutation. In a fearsome habit that this might be a superior, Reiner glanced up to know who it was. Even in the rather still dark room lit by a kerosene lamp on his desk, he would still recognize this silhouette anywhere.

Smaller than him yet by no means weaker, had he been Reiner’s height he would surely be buffer than he topped four years ago. His white uniform was messy, his tie nowhere to be seen, his jacket only placed on his shoulder without being buttoned up and the collar of his shirt was disordered. If the situation was different, as if it could, Reiner might have tried to warn him about the unconventional outfit. Not that it was bothering him personally but… What if a superior would see it?

It would not happen though. Most of them were dead. The circumstances were too critical to allow a warrior to be reprimanded or punished for something as trivial as this. Even if the hatred against Eldians had grown exponentially since the attack, even if they were even more suspected after Zeke’s betrayal, they were still useful to Marley. Their last defense.

Reiner's eyes returned to the papers scattered on his desk. Whatever Galliard wanted with him –be it a message from the general or more arguments, he would say it. There was no trouble for him to spit harsh words at Reiner's face without any consideration, so no need to lose time by asking him what he was doing here up this late.

Yet, the silence lasted far too long with only footsteps to be heard. A sigh echoed to his ears making Reiner finally look back up immediately. Galliard was standing closer, across his desk staring at the papers he was working on. Even from upside down, it was obvious what it was about, that map of Paradis Island dribbled with his notes would be a giveaway to anyone.

“How long have you been stuck up in here?” Galliard scowled, letting his thoughts be known as usual. Reiner was grateful for it, no subterfuge, no beating around the bushes he would have to go through.

Honest, straightforward Galliard. He was no deceiver, no liar. Always acting before thinking and after everything that happened, Reiner appreciated this even more.

“I need to finish this. You and Pieck would need any information I can remember.” Reiner pointed out, not enjoying in the least this plan of infiltration the commander –no, general Magath had come up with.

Sure, a straightforward attack would be a disaster, they needed information on what had happened on the island for four years now that they knew Paradis Force had contacts with Zeke and his sympathizers. How much did they help one another? Did they trust one another? What was their common goal?

Why did Zeke _betray_ them?

Infiltrating the island was a good idea, Reiner agreed… But why couldn't he be part of it? He knew that island more than anyone in the Marley force! How ironic it was that he so desperately desired to go back there now...

“All your information will be outdated, _they_ moved on.” _Unlike you._ As always seeking a fight, yet when Reiner looked up at him there was no animosity in those hazel eyes.

No, they looked... Concerned? This took him aback for a second before nodding.

“Right... I guess, you're right.” Reiner muttered, letting go of his pen and staring at what he had been writing.

Trivial facts about the various military corps on Paradis, the different customs, or also some historical figures among the walls –all of it was garbage. It was not like Pieck and Galliard would have a surprise history test upon setting foot in there. Besides, how much had that island changed since he left it?

Four years might not be much, but judging how much it had changed in the five years of his mission there, it was bound for it to have changed drastically like Eren. The mere memory of his meeting with his former friend was enough for Reiner to be out of breath, his hands starting to sweat, his heart tightening, it was all his fau—

“ **Rest**. It's already way past the curfew.” Galliard caught him out of this coming madness.

His mind appreciated the break, having something else –anything else to think about instead of…

“…We don't have a curfew anymore.” Reiner pointed out, still short-winded.

He had no desire to rest. What was the point of lying on this too small for him bed when he knew for a fact that all he was going to be having was restless nightmares? In here, he was useful.

Or at least he hoped so...

“Who cares about that damn curfew, you need to rest. Don't make me send the general on you and just do what I say!” Galliard growled; his impatience evident in his voice. Ignoring how technically Reiner was a higher rank than him was sort of funny as he tried to order him around with the threat of calling Magath if he didn't obey.

How nostalgic it was that it reminded him of how their relationship used to be when they were just kids.

For the past few weeks, since the attack on Liberio actually, they were on... friendlier terms?

“I can't.”

Well, whatever it was, it seemed like they were back to square one. Yet, there was something sentimental in them arguing even the night before the start of their mission, before Galliard and Pieck along with few trustworthy soldiers were going to be sent on Paradis to collect information on Eren's and Zeke's but also Gabi's and Falco's locations for the rest of the operation to function.

Reiner could not help thinking this was a bad idea to go their separate ways.

If back then, during that last battle in Shiganshina, the warriors had stood together… Zeke had been the one coming up with this plan and judging how his own plans had gone, Reiner had agreed. He had believed in the war chief, believed in everyone’s strengths, and yet it had not been enough. He could not help thinking again and again about that day, about what-ifs that were too late to imagine. What if they stood side by side, protecting each other when facing the Survey Corps? What if they had succeeded in their mission?

They might have been able to save Annie too... Liberio would have been safe, Bertolt, Udo, Zofia, and countless more people would not be dead, Gabi and Falco would not be missing, Zeke might have not betrayed them then...

None of this would have occurred if Marcel had not protected him.

“What do you mean ‘you can't’?!” Galliard's hands smashed into the desk.

Marcel would have come up with better plans than his lacking ones.

With no answers from Reiner, Galliard’s anger grew as he threw away most of the papers from the desk onto the ground in an attempt to get his attention, having them fight one more time instead of dodging his questions like usual.

And it worked with Reiner groaning, powerless to prevent the mess that had become the room.

“Galliard!”

“You think you're the only one who can't sleep?!” Galliard argued, making Reiner realize just how close they were. He could indeed gaze at those dark rings under the other's eyes. This was bad.

“You should be the resting, your part in this mission is a lot more complex than mine.” Reiner let go of the paper he was still holding, leaning down so that he could try to gather up those on the ground. Instead, he felt Galliard's hands onto his tie dragging him to stand up. His hazel eyes staring back at him.

“You think I don't know? No way I would want a loser like you to take any major role on that capital mission. You failed terribly at the last attempt.” Galliard's words echoed Reiner's own doubts within his heart.

The general had said that his face was known too much within those walls to be able to join the infiltration mission, adding how they would need him by their sides when launching the attack in case Pieck and Galliard did not succeed. But Reiner knew the true reason, everyone did. It was because he had failed just like Galliard said.

Reiner would be the one left behind this time as it was supposed to have been all those years ago…

This feeling… It must be how Galliard felt when he did not get the Armored titan, upon watching everyone else going to Paradis but him...

His eyelids closed –his eyes were burning… The grip on his tie loosened up. A second later he was freed, falling back onto the chair behind him. This was right, he had been nothing but a failure all his life. What a joke how he thought that perhaps since they were facing Paradis that he could be useful with his knowledge, that somehow, he could redeem his past errors.

There was no redemption, no forgiveness possible either for someone like him. This mission was the only thing on his mind, granting him a new resolve –more desire to live. He would stop Eren even if it cost him his life. Victory was the only outcome possible. It was all his fault to begin with, anyway.

“ _Fuck_... This wasn't... I— I said too much...” Galliard was sounding remorseful although he was right. Before Reiner tried to tell him that, that there was no need to apologize, Galliard continued speaking in this hoarse voice –leaving him speechless. “Look, this was not... I did not come here to fight with you. It's just... You should take care of yourself. We need you.”

Reiner's eyes shot open at those words.

Straightforward and no liar Galliard was telling _him_ these words? No way. 

“The Armor will be in top condition, don't worry.”

Galliard must have learned in which state it had last appeared, this must be why he was trying to get Reiner to rest. There was nothing to worry about yet. Reiner's determination to save Gabi and Falco, his desire to fix his past mistakes… They were all fuel to him. He was going to live through sheer will until he accomplished his missions.

“This is not what I meant...” Galliard groaned, his hands moving up to his hair to mess them up. It had been the only part of his appearance that was perfectly ordered, now gone under his ministrations. Another sigh left his mouth upon realizing too late that there were strands falling over his face.

“Galliard?” Reiner called out, the silence between them uncomfortable. _What was it that you meant then?_ He desired to wonder aloud but feared this would sabotage everything, taking away the courage Galliard was trying to muster to answer it.

“We're worried about you, **you**. Reiner Braun. Not just the Armored Titan.” Galliard finally mumbled, giving up on trying to fix his hair again and ending up using it to hide behind those strands. This had Reiner's heart beating faster for a whole different reason than panic attacks or anxiety.

It was a nice change.

“ _We_?” Reiner repeated in a stupor.

“Yeah, everyone. Colt, Pieck, General Magath...” Galliard scoffed. Somehow finding the idea of Magath worrying about an Eldian extremely hilarious, especially after all the hard training they had to go through in their childhood by the then commander.

Though Reiner was focused on someone else.

“Even _you_?”

This took Galliard aback. Despite that temporary fringe, Reiner could still notice how his eyes grew bigger as if caught into a trap. But there was no trap. It was just an ordinary and simple question whose answer could potentially mean more than anything else in his life right now.

Actually, it must be a trap.

Reiner stood up, about to give up seeking this answer. Surrender was the best thing to do, not needing more things to mull over, especially not the night before they were going to part. However, Galliard took that sudden movement for a challenge and dove headfirst deeper into that trap.

“ **Yes** , even me.” Galliard's head was looking up at him due to their height difference. His hair was barely hiding his eyes anymore, falling onto the sides of his face. There was no point in having a barrier with the way Galliard's heart was baring itself in front of Reiner thanks to those words.

Straightforward and no liar Galliard. Accepting any challenges thrown at him without fear.

“...”

And here he was, Reiner Braun. A loser, unable to proceed with such honesty thrown at his face. His cheeks and whole body were burning, even hotter than when he was in the Armored Titan’s nape.

Galliard was waiting, a lot more patiently than Reiner thought he was capable of. His hands gripping at his pants were giving away how anxious he in fact was but Reiner was too stunned to make fun of it, to rill him over such genuine caring he was showing him, _him_ out of anyone. No, he wanted to bask in this feeling for as long as he could.

“Fine... I'm going to rest.” Reiner nodded, confirming those words before kneeling to reach the discarded papers and other objects that were previously on his desk. The relief on Galliard's face was now turning into disbelief.

“Oi! Leave that here and go home, I will tidy it.” Reiner looked up at him with a grin. Galliard was already bending down, rushing to gather most of the papers without a bother to order it.

“This doesn’t look like you’re tidying it.” At that remark, Galliard scowled, placing the papers he had collected messily onto the desk.

“Just shut up and go home.”

Reiner smiled at the familiarity. Galliard was back to being his usual self.

Good.

“It will be faster if we do it together…” Cooperation was not the best between them at first but the more they practiced, the more it seemed like they were a perfect match, always in synchronicity on the battlefield. And yet, Galliard was going to Paradis without him… “You need to rest as well, remember?”

Without much more arguments left, they ended up working together to fix the mess that had become the desk room. The kerosene light was out so they did not bother classifying every document properly to Reiner's chagrin who would need to do that later on.

It would be a nice distraction from overly thinking about the infiltration mission.

The rest of Marley’s army along with Reiner would be coming to Paradis by air one week from now, no matter how the infiltration mission would go. Shiganshina was most likely where Eren was anyway, Reiner was almost certain of it.

One week to wait.

One week to speculate about Pieck's and Galliard's wellbeing. Would they even be able to send information safely upon reaching Paradis? What if they were found out before Reiner and everyone else arrived? All those questions were most likely all Reiner would think about for the next coming days. Well, what was the difference between one or two or a whole week of sleepless nights?

Galliard must have noticed his troubled thoughts since his hand slapped his back, taking Reiner out of his inner thoughts.

“Stop agonizing next to me already.” He grumbled. “It’s going to be fine. I won't underestimate them again.”

They were walking side by side through the empty and dark corridors. They did not need lights in the headquarters, knowing by heart the path. However, as Reiner turned his face towards Galliard, he could notice thanks to the moonlight how focused Galliard's eyes were. There was a fire within them, a burning rage to seek revenge on the devils for what they did to Liberio, to their home.

“Don't let yourself be moved by your feelings,” Reiner mumbled, catching Galliard's attention. “Being driven by rage is not the solution... We have to be focused and poised.”

_Don't be like how I was_ , was more what Reiner wished to say. He remembered how emotionally conflicted he had been upon capturing Eren and revealing his true identities back then. How the word 'traitor' was still resonating in his heart, how Bertolt's cries for forgiveness to the rest of their comrades were still haunting him...

They had acted so much upon how they felt back then, still too young to understand it would be their downfall. Reiner had lost sight of their objective clouded by emotions, this time he would not make the same mistakes.

Eren was his enemy, the world's enemy. They had to stop him no matter what.

“Are you trying to tell that to me or yourself?” Galliard's teasing being obvious in his voice.

This had been a new sight for Reiner to get familiar with during those last few weeks since the attack on Liberio. It was a side of Galliard's personality that he had never been used to before, only Marcel must have witnessed it, maybe Pieck too. This was not a jab at him, a teasing not meant to make him feel bad, and whenever it occurred, Reiner was lost on how to respond.

This time yet, he could not stop a chuckle from escaping his mouth. Was he that obvious, that open about his feelings for even Galliard to notice them? Galliard stopped in his tracks for a second before grumbling something Reiner could not hear and walking faster this time. Whatever it was, it seemed to be something not meant for him so he did not inquire more.

“I will not waver again. I will stop Eren no matter what.” Reiner mentioned a few minutes later, stopping in his track to stare behind him at the building they had just left.

How many days, months, years had he spent there? Training since he was a kid on those fields around it, learning how to fight, and even upon becoming a Warrior, this building had still become a second house for him. If not for the curfew, Reiner would have surely spent nights there working.

How ironic was it for him to think words that he as a soldier would have said? _Saving humanity_ , huh? Guess somehow both the warrior and the soldier would have agreed on something in the end. This was why Reiner was so sure that he would no longer waver. This mission was giving him an occasion to fix some of his errors as well as reconcile himself with his ‘former self’. Upon taking down the Founder, making Eren at peace, he might find some as well.

“Look at you pretending to be a hero, saving the world by yourself.” Galliard scoffed, poking at his side with a nudge. Reiner's eyes moved to stare at him then.

_Porco Galliard._

If someone had told Reiner when he was a kid that he would be by Galliard's side till the end, his younger self would have not believed him. They had joined Pieck and Zeke later on in the warrior training since they were older than them. So, Galliard was the one he knew for the longest. That small boy sitting next to him during that test which had allowed him to join the warrior program. What was the chance of them sitting next to each other in this room filled with so many other Eldians? What was the chance for them to end up standing together like this a decade later?

From childhood friends to rivals to sworn enemies to forced comrades fighting side by side to this weird friendship… To say they had been through a lot together was an understatement. Yet, Reiner was not disappointed for Galliard to be his longest acquaintance. Somehow, he even felt pleased with how their relationship improved to become what it was. Marcel would have been so proud of them, that was for sure.

Reiner could have not asked for someone better to be by his side at this moment. Someone who would spell it out, who would not hesitate to argue with him, who would share the same common goal, who had such synchronicity with him on the battlefield… Someone he—

“You're Marley’s shield, you better not die.” Galliard's fist softly hit his chest.

How long had they been staring at each other in silence?

Even if it was late, the full moon was allowing them to gaze at each other's faces. Galliard was grinning, looking still resolved like moments ago though it did not seem to be tainted by revenge anymore. Reiner could not help smiling himself. Galliard had always hated how Reiner was seen as this shield, mocking how easy it was to shatter it, so for him to say these words… It was such a pleasant surprise.

Nonetheless, there was something Reiner could agree with. He would not throw away his life like he almost did that night meeting with Eren after four years of tormenting himself.

Reiner would fight till the very end.

And Galliard would be **there** by his side.

**Author's Note:**

> Next chapter will be from Porco's perspective, I'll do my best to post asap!


End file.
